Prehistoric Cavewives Break Flint
Last week, an excavation in Sweden turned up an object that bears the unmistakable look of a flint breaker carved out of antler bone, though scientists can't be exactly sure what it was used for.
For those not aware of what a flint breaker is: Flint Breaker.
The carved bone was unearthed at a Mesolithic site in Motala, Sweden, that is rich with ancient artifacts from between 4,000 to 6,000 B.C. The area's unique features may have allowed bone artifacts, which usually get destroyed over the millennia, to survive, allowing this priceless artifact to remain naturally hard for much longer than 4-6 hours.
"The object may have been used as a tool, such as to chip flakes of flint," archaeologist Gšran Gruber of the National Heritage Board in Sweden, who worked on the excavation. "One end is shaped into more of a point." he said.
It's not immediately clear whether the tool would have been one most likely to be used by men or women or both.
"It's an organic object, that's why it's special," Gruber told LiveScience. "Normally when we excavate early Mesolithic sites we never get the organic material. But this site where we're excavating now is along the shoreline. The preservation is very good here – it's been lying in the bottom sediments and clay layers of the river, and it's been well preserved there."
While some see a prehistoric tool used to break flint, others have made astounding accusations that it actually resembles actor Owen Wilson's nose, while others make the argument that it is an almost exact match to an all meat thermometer , Baby's arm holding an apple, Doctor Wang, and a purple headed yogurt slinger (no image could be found).
I don't know about the other things, but sure looks like a wiener to me.
The dildo-like object is about 4 inches (10.5 cm) long and 0.8 inches (2 cm) in diameter, leaving many to wonder if it was somehow transported to the European area from Asia, due to its advanced artistic carving techniques...and having nothing to do with it's size, or lack there of...because that would be stereotyping. And stereotyping is wrong.
But this is not the first time that sexually explicit relics have been discovered from history. Another item strongly resembling a penis was unearthed in Germany in 2005. That one is even older — dating from 28,000 years ago — and made of stone, as well as the recent discovery of explicit drawings of cave people having sex. (WARNING: link contains graphic material).
Archeologists around the world are waiting to see what else is uncovered in the days and weeks to come, in hopes of getting a better understanding of what prehistoric life may have been like for the lonely cavewife left at home as her caveman ventures out into the dangerous wilderness risking his life just to make sure she has some decent food on the table, and only asking that in return she simply does the dishes from time-to-time, possibly gave him a break with her constant bitching after a hard day, and God-for-bid stopped having intercourse with random strangers, the neighbor, and the Stegosaurus down the street. I'm just saying.
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